Tuesday
Woke up early enough to work on story and get ready for NAIT. Visit to NAIT and thinking positively about getting in for the fall. Spending time with T, being a little wild, having fun and celebrating our friendship. Finally making it to Westmount to pick up things from the gym. It was a shame that most of my stuff had been stolen or given away but such is life.
Wednesday
The hospital poked my brain for DBT testing. I knew it was going to be long and potentially triggering. Yet with all the potential drama ahead of me I made it to the appointment on time. I was honest and prompt with the tester. I didn't scream, kick or say it was unfair. I now have way to many baked goods in my house as I found solace in the bakery section of Safeway and at a nearby fast food joint. I did walk home from the hospital. To deal I ate sticky buns and cake, I wrote rambling swirly letters with to much honesty and clear unhidden wanting, I played games with my friends and enjoyed a quick walk for slushies and drinks with Mr. Fox. I looked at job posting and I got to paint pretty pictures and look at paint.
Thursday
Sent of more please hire me letters with my CV attached. Worked on tiding my room. A much easier feat these days. Called NAIT's SSD department and left a message. I might go for a wander, mail a letter and it's very likely I'll eat some green and healthy things as the day is still young.
Friday
Disappoint tinged with anger sent me on a walk. A long bouncy walk and it was good to get away from the triggers and the feeling of crushing loss. Going to game was a step and a good one and then doing more stepping when I got there. Walking to go get food for everyone with a friend makes my three things for K.
Saturday
Ouch. Oooh. Erm. I jogged up and down the stairs and mostly hid in my room napping and trying to get over the icky feelings. Ooooh. I also wrote and found shiny things for story and the next big adventure. I mostly did three things for K...
Sunday
More Ouch. Oooh. Erm. I hid in my room some more. Cranky and not well and didn't want to go to game, but away I went. Seeing people, building up the confidence levels and getting to gush made it worth it. I also got do shiny things for a friend. Yes outside of my budget and totally missing the point of healthy but shiny and so it counts. That as good as it's going to get for the moment.
Monday
Off to NAIT I went and it went well. I even got in early. I walked to game, beat the rain and managed to triumph over the crashing feelings and the headache of doom. I also worked on story for the next adventure. I also hunted for jobs, ate apples not fast food and called my mummy.
Another week of finding K. <3 I hope you can all still love me anyway.
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